by Dr. Kendra A. O’Hora, LCMFT

Observant, curious, knowledgeable, and distant.

Does this sound like someone you know? These traits describe only a small snapshot of the Enneagram Type Fives we love! Let’s dig a bit deeper…

So, each week at Wellness & Co. Amanda & Dylan (our resident relationship coaches and Enneagram teachers) will be hosting a panel exploring each Enneagram type. We’ve already tackled so many types! You can register to watch the panels here – sign up for one or for all nine! (PS – if you cannot attend the panel live, you can still register and watch the webinar later on your own time)! And, if you’re interested in purchasing a previous webinar that you missed – contact us, we’ll get them to you right away!

THIS WEEK – TYPE FIVE!

This style of learning and exploring the Enneagram is bound to give you new insights, new context to the nine types, and new pathways for growth from Type Structure to True Self! 

So, in that spirit – in honor of our panel series we’ll be sharing some thoughts from YOU.

We’ve compiled reflections from all over to shed some light on our dear friends, Type Five. Particularly, what’s it like being married to a Type Five and what it’s like being a Type Five Mama!

Fives are extra special around here. Did you know my hubby is a Type Five? And I have a couple family members who are Type Five’s, too – I guess I like those deep thinking, analytical, loyal types!

Fives are more than just deep thinkers, they can often be ahead of their time, brainstorming new ways of doing things, inventing, and collecting information to fuels their desire to stay knowledgeable. On the other hand, Fives struggle with avarice, a form of greed where they do not want to offer their knowledge or energy easily. We know and loves Fives for their thoughtful contributions, generosity, and curiosity. So…

HERE’S WHAT OUR DEAR FRIENDS, FAMILY, AND WELLNESS & CO. COMMUNITY SAID ABOUT BEING PARTNERED WITH TYPE FIVE!

• Being married to a 5 is so so special!!! He is very intent on being efficient, and that includes marriage (lol) but he sees being efficient in marriage as serving me. He doesn’t expend his full energy on many people at all, and to be someone that he feels comfortable enough to give his energy to and get his energy from is an honor, and it makes our connection so strong and special. Sometimes we struggle with how and when we should give to others (time, money, etc), because I want to give so much to our people, but his thing is greed, so as his wife I need to challenge him to go beyond his comfort zone while also respecting his limits. I could go on and on, but there are a few little things. I feel like the luckiest girl in the whole world to be married to a wonderful 5 🥰
• Being married to a Five…. I think the biggest stand out is that in my marriage I am given a lot of support, room and space for growth. I am encouraged in all that I want to do and take on. He is very respectful of me and what I think. Communication is not always direct and that can be a challenge. His stress increases with the unknown and I do not always have the patiences for the questions and seeking of knowledge. He needs more alone time and that has led to misunderstandings and insecurities.
• Being married to a Five….you have to have a lot of patience; be conscious of the demands you are asking for. They are very trustworthy, honest, and genuine. Someone you can trust to have all the information that it would take to solve the problem or keep you safe. Dependable. Never not there when you need them. Even if they don’t know how to be there, they are always going to show up.
• My Five partner is an intellectual mastermind, I never feel bored! My partner can think of things in ways I could never even dream of but struggles with follow through or “getting things done.” We click with shared interests: like TV shows, pets/children, etc. We don’t jive when my spouse wants a lot of time alone and I’d like to reconnect. I’m grateful for my Five – there’s a lot of loyalty, curiosity, and confidence in his realm. He’s a bit headstrong and intense at times, too!

Thank you for sharing what it is like being partnered with a Type Five! Your words and insights are helping us continue to honor and understand the strengths and challenges of partnerships with the Enneagram Type Five!

And what about Mama Five? They are inspiring teachers, curious creators, and offer a presence of calm and priority for rest. Let’s learn more! …

WANNA KNOW MORE? HERE’S WHAT OUR TYPE FIVE MAMAS SHARED ABOUT THEIR MOTHERHOOD EXPERIENCE! 

• I’ve learned that being around your child can remind you how simple life can be and the importance of stopping to smell the roses and be present in the moment.
• As a parent I appreciate being involved in something that is “unmolded,” it’s freeing and not restrictive. I enjoy pouring into my child and shaping their worldview.
• I value as a parent seeing wonder from my the eyes of my children. They are flexible and open minded and that keeps things fun and playful. I like sharing my wonder and discovery with my kids.
• I’ve learned that each of my children need something different and that can feel exhausting, like they are taking more than I have. On the other hand, they don’t always appreciate what I bring to the table. Some of my kids don’t like my jokes, my poking, or my curiosity. I have to shift more to meet their needs, which feels like a lot.
• We enjoy reading, learning, and exploring together. But to be honest, I don’t always have the energy to keep up which I perceive lets my children down.

Curious to know what it’s like being a Type Five? Tune in August 18th at 6pm when we explore the life and experiences of some pretty amazing Type Fours!

If you’ve been loving our Enneagram panel series as much as we are you might be thinking about how you can use the Enneagram to continue enhancing yourself and your relationship!

Good news! …

We have Enneagram and relationship coaches here on staff at Wellness & Co. Check them out!

AND

You can enhance your romantic bond by signing up for our newsletter and getting a FREE e-guide: Three Quick Steps for Getting Your Marriage Unstuck!