By Ana Rogers, LGPC, NCC

READING TIME: 3 MINUTES

Hey there! How ya doin’? 

As we traverse yet another holiday season, this might be a loaded question for many of us. We might not even know how to answer. The chaotic to-ing and fro-ing this time of year is often all-consuming, after all. 

Maybe we haven’t even had a moment to check in with ourselves in a hot minute! 

So… I’ll invite you to do that now. Yes, right now. Sit with yourself for a moment. Be still, pause, and breathe. I’m right here with you.

Again, I’ll ask, how ya doin’? 

In sessions with clients and in various areas of my personal life (including in my own therapy – yes, I will continue to stand on my soapbox and emphatically proclaim that the best therapists often have therapists), I’m noticing a handful of themes surfacing. Many of us experience and feel similar things this time of year, whether we openly talk about it or not. 

Let this be a reminder that you’re not alone, and that the holidays bring forth a mixture of feelings. Maybe joy is walking hand in hand with grief and loss…and we can hold space for all of it. 

Here is what is surfacing for many of us:

Grief and loss. 

The holiday season often coincides with deeper reflection. Who is missing from our lives? These might be loved ones who have passed, family members whom we have chosen to distance ourselves from, and/or friends and partners who for some reason can’t be with us or with whom we no longer have connection. We also might be missing and longing for the warm companionship of a furry friend. For those of us who have intentionally distanced ourselves from loved ones, there are often mixed feelings of grief sitting directly beside relief and peace. Please know I see you, and this is so normal. 

Joy with providing our children safe holiday environments. 

Many clients have recently been processing what it’s like for them to be breaking harmful intergenerational family patterns, providing their children with healthy environments they themselves did not experience growing up. In a way, they are healing their own inner child in the process! What a powerful, beautiful thing. 

Post-election anxiety (and general anticipation anxiety for gatherings).

More specifically, significant concern has popped up regarding how to navigate family gatherings with loved ones we don’t see eye to eye. Gentle reminder that we can always unapologetically remove ourselves from environments that become hostile or feel unwelcoming – and if emotional or physical safety is at risk, not going is also very much okay. 

Looking forward to annual traditions, old and new alike. 

For many of us, this time of year is also rooted in heritage. We also might be creating new traditions and memories with our chosen family. I personally look forward to making homemade pierogis every year, just like my grandmother taught me. And one of my best friends and I more recently began treating ourselves to a historic afternoon tea for the holidays! Is there anything you look forward to this time of year? Tell me about it in the comments! 

I want to encourage you to check in with yourself this way more often. Be gentle with yourselves this time of year (and always), and again, know you’re not alone.

The Wellness & Co. team is also always here if you’re looking for more individualized connection and support! Check us out here and please be in touch. We love hearing from you. 

With love,

Ana